Life after the last post.

One month. One fucked up month. Finally I get a chance to blog. These thirty days were probably the worst days I've had in my 16 years of life.

The last time I posted was on 14th of November. After that, I couldn't think of anything to write for 4 days (to be honest, even in the previous post I hadn't typed anything, just posted my own essay). I thought I'd get ideas after college starts (don't ask me why).
How wrong I was.

19th November- College starts

And we mass bunk on the first day itself. I kinda betrayed my classmates cuz we had decided to skip the practical as well, but I attended the pracs :P. So the whole day I was practically lying at home, doing nothing. Being a potato, as my friend says (go figure). So nothing special about this day.

20th November- The fail plan

So my college had this really big, beautiful lake, and two of my friends from another college wanted to see it, badly. So I called them over. But our plan of getting in was foiled by the stupid watchmen. Bloody idiots, always let people enter the college after they enter their names in the register, and that day they didn't. So like always, we roamed on the streets, got ourselves tanned, and then went to McD just because we wanted a place to sit. And though the plan was to come to my college, I ended up in their college instead. How ironic.

21st November- Musical

One of the colleges in my city had this fest going on, so me and two of my friends(who were in the same college, and actually are the same ones who I mentioned in the last para) decided to go. We went for this band event, which was pretty good, except for one thing. They made the audiences sit. In an AC hall. Like a fucking wedding reception. Apart from that, the bands were good. Most of them played covers of famous songs like, I want it that way (Backstreet Boys), Rolling in the deep (Adele), 21 Guns (Green Day), Californication (Red Hot Chili Peppers), etc. The band which played Californication were especially good.

22nd November- Light up the world

Today I was too bored to attend college so I thought I'll sit at home and do nothing. Just then one of my friend told me about these street lights that she had discovered while on a walk. So she asked me if I wanted to check them out. Considering I wasn't gonna do anything anyways, I said ok. And I sure didn't regret it. The lights were absolutely beautiful and mesmerizing. I felt so peaceful by just standing under those multicolored lights. Words can't explain how I really felt at that moment. I took some pictures which I have posted below.

23rd November- Shit

Worst day of the year. I'll keep it short cuz I really don't wanna talk about it. So I go for the last day of the same fest which I mentioned before, for a dance event me and my friends wanted to see. We reach there and they announce some actress is gonna come to the fest. Hurrah. Security tripled. And people who are inside can't leave the campus until she comes. Plus events are delayed. And in the end, the bitch doesn't show up. Me and one of my friend were stuck there till 7. Bastards.

24th November- Shit- Part 2

I wake up with a high fever. Dunno why. Maybe yesterday was so stressful that's why, I think. Not completely right. I survive through the day with some tablets and meds.

25th/26th November- Somebody kill me

I again wake up with high fever. But this time, it invited headache over and both of them had a great time together. My head was about to burst and I seriously wanted someone to chop it off for me. Yeah, that much pain. I somehow survive through the day with painkillers and then mom took me to the doctor, who sees not much wrong about the weird headache. Even the next day is kinda same, just the headache is a little less. But still it's there. Still I wanted to chop my head off.

27th-30th November- Eye see your problem

Wow, my luck doesn't get more better than this. I have a swollen eye when I wake up. And so here's another visit to another doctor. He says I've got sinusitis. Yay. His meds work better than the first doctors. I'm still pissed with my life. Why, why, why.

1st-4th December- Life's a bitch, karma is a bigger bitch

I skip classes, college. Sit at home and groan and moan. My eye gets better, but the sinus doesn't wanna leave me. It loves me so much. And even the fever returns. Great. Just great. And before sleeping I notice my eye is starting to swell again. Fucking awesome.
2nd December, I don't get to meet one of my best friends on her birthday, cuz of this shit. I remember, during the first week when college re-opened, I had lied to that English teacher that I couldn't come to college cuz of some sickness. And karma had other ideas for me.

5th-6th December- Truth

I visit another doctor, this time an ENT specialist, who was pretty experienced. One check and he says I've got some "acute pus sinusitis" and I may need a surgery, though there was a minute possibility of me getting well with his medicines. Cool.

7th-8th December- Another visit

Wow, I wonder how many doctors I met during the course of this shit. I meet a surgeon, who had operated on my dad some years back for the same problem. And he confirmed that I needed a surgery at the earliest, maybe 2-3 days later. Awesome.

9th December- Here it goes

I got admitted to a hospital early in the morning so the surgery could take place as soon as possible. At 10am I'm taken in the operation theatre and the surgery goes on for an hour and half. Obviously obviously I don't remember anything, cuz I was on full anesthesia, neither did I have an astral projection (which my friend hoped would happen with me). I gain consciousness after about an hour after the surgery. And they tell me I can't eat/drink anything for four hours. FUCK. My throat was parched, and I desperately needed to drink water. I don't know how I survived those four hours, they seemed like four years. The rest of the day, I mostly slept.

10th-12th December- Survival

I. Hate. Hospital. Food. It's as if they don't buy salt at all. Plus I couldn't eat slowly cuz my nose was bandaged, and I had to breathe with my mouth. But thank God they didn't prohibit outsiders from bringing food. So my aunt sent me chicken sandwiches and the next day, my cousin sis brought chicken gravy for me. Phew. I got a discharge on the third day, and boy was I glad to get out of that depressing building. I don't know how doctors, nurses, ward boys, etc survive in hospitals. It's mentally tiring to stay in there.

So now I'm back home, with one week bed rest orders, and I'm pretty much bored as hell. And as much as I hate it, I wanna go back to college and classes just to get back to my normal life once again.

I hope someone read the whole thing (I doubt it) cuz I know this one was boring.

Anyways, I'll be back with a better post the next time, until then adios.

A New Year, A New Resolution.

Another year, come and gone.  Just a few hours left before we leave 2013 and enter 2014. People are celebrating; rejoicing the passing of another year. The lights, the music, all show how happy everyone is. Like every year everyone is making their New Year's resolution (which I doubt anyone takes seriously these days). I've never made any resolution of such. I've always thought that I don't need to change just because someone thinks I'm not right about something. Either you like me, or you don't. As simple as that. Anyway I don't think I'll be able to follow any resolution religiously. This year has been different though. Very, very different. It has been a kind of a roller coaster ride for me. Where the roller coaster usually goes down. But it does come up after some time, though with some difficulty.

This year has been difficult. Very difficult. From a confused soul, ignoring the obvious truth just to get my mind off things, to gradually accepting the reality. To realizing that it was never meant to be. To moving on. To finally finding happiness and peace. Then again to the phase of being confused. And the hardest part came when life was at it's worst, throwing all kinds of hurdles at me. The most difficult part was crossing these hurdles.
But it's not as if this year was completely bad. No, not at all. The best part being, making my parents proud with my academic results. Then talking again to a long lost friend. Having an awesome time with school friends. Starting with college, a new beginning. Meeting new people. Making some awesome new friends. And finally with me starting to blog (which is awesome for you too, you're getting a chance read my writings. Be thankful :P).

To be honest, this year has been unique. Having it's own ups and downs and some more downs. But the downs of this year are not what bother me. Bad times come and go, and we eventually forget about them. And good times pass by so quickly that you don't remember them. No, it's not about the good and bad times. It's about living without regrets. About not having sleepless nights, thinking of something which gives you pain. Can I look back to this year and think, have I lived my life without any regrets? Have I followed what my heart says, without thinking of the consequences? I don't think so. I've made many mistakes, and even though I won't repeat them again, I don't think I'll forget them easily either. There are many "what if..." 's and "only if..." 's questions still running around in my head.  True happiness is obtained only if you live life without any of these questions in the back of your mind. Because life is too short to have any regrets. Yesterday I heard that one guy from my school (who was my senior) met with an accident and was killed on the spot. Even though I didn't know him much, I still was pretty much in a state of shock. The guy had his whole life before him, and all his dreams, his parents' dreams were shattered in a matter of seconds. Just like that. It's really scary to know that such sort of things can happen to any of us. And we don't have any control over it. It's fate, and whether we like it or not, we have to accept our fate.

So even though I never make any resolutions at the end of the year, this year I'm gonna make an exception. This year, I resolve to live life without any regrets. No "if's" to bother me. And I'll follow what my heart says, not what other people want me to do. And I hope that when 2014 ends, I'll look back to a year which couldn't have been better. A year which will be unforgettable a good sense. A year full of happiness. A year without regrets.

Wishing all those who are reading this a Merry Christmas and a prosperous New Year.

Adios and take care.

It's time.

Here's my winning entry for the Bhavans Essay Writing Competition.

ARE WOMEN REALLY SAFE IN INDIA?

          When was the last time you remember seeing a young girl, passing through a street full of men, not getting leers, wolf-whistles and cheap comments passed upon her, or rather thrown upon her, by the street hoodlums? Don’t remember? Or such a scene seems unimaginable? That’s exactly the picture of safety of women on the streets of India. Not a single day passes without the news of women being molested, eve-teased, raped and assaulted in newspapers and news channels. Everyday, there’s a new case of molestation, rape, suicide due to dowry harassment etc recorded and every time there is an outrage all over the nation. But does that really change anything? The answer is no. The case drags on in the files of the courts, the victim has little hope of getting justice and in the end, such vile men get more confidence in doing such shameful act of disgrace.

          After the rape of a twenty-three year old student in a moving bus by five men in the capital of the nation, there was a huge outcry in the country against the disgusting crime. People came out on the streets to protest against the government’s inability to stop such crimes. People wanted to know how these men got so much confidence in committing such a disgraceful act. But even after that, was there any major change in the attitude of the government in handling such situations? No. Women are still unsafe on the streets of India. Yes, it’s true that the parliament had made the punishment for the rape accused more stringent, but that punishment is only possible if the accused is found guilty after a long trial and investigation by the court. In the mean time, the accused can roam around by his free will. Does it do any good to the mental condition of the already scarred victims? Fast track courts though established in some places are yet to be set up in some major cities of the country. Even though the judicial system is trying to do its best, the major problem is the mentality of the people. Many cases are not even recorded as the family thinks about what others might think about them. No one considers the mental state of the victim.

          Was India always this unsafe for women? Did women always have to think twice before boarding an empty train compartment? Were women always so skeptical about walking through a secluded lane, alone? If no, then what happened to India over the years? How did the streets became so unsafe? According to me, it’s the attitude of the men towards women which has degraded over the years. Yes, women were always considered inferior to men, which is sad but true, but never did men had such attitude towards women, branding them as mere commodities. Maybe it is because of the influence of the western maybe because of our own film industry. But, whatever the cause may be, it cannot be denied that women are vulnerable even in what was considered to be an ideal and safe country for women. The growing rates in crime speak otherwise. Sadly, India has become one of the most unsafe countries in the world for women.

          So in the end, the question is what exactly needs to be done to make women more secure in this country? How can the world’s largest democracy also become one of the safest countries for women, like before? Firstly, the attitude of the people towards raped and molested victims needs to be changed .They should feel more confident in approaching the police for recording their statement, and not hesitant like the case is now. Secondly, the attitude of men towards the women has to change. Men should realize that there is more to a girl than just her body. They should realize the mental torture a girl undergoes after being molested or raped by vile men. Moreover, they should realize that men and women are equal and God has made no discrimination between them. The day India has zero crime rate against women, will be the day that India has actually progressed. Only when the women of India  are safe enough to go out on a street alone, without any fear, will I say  that I am proud to be an Indian. Only then, will India be fully developed. Yes it is a distant dream, but change only comes when you dream and I dream for an India which can keep its women safe.

YOU MAY SAY I'M A DREAMER,

BUT I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE.

                      I HOPE ONE DAY YOU'LL JOIN US

AND THE WORLD WILL BE AS ONE.

-John Lennon

If still nothing goes right, take a walk with a friend

And the bad days continue. Today wasn't as bad as yesterday, though it was pretty bad. I knew yesterday's fight was my fault and I owed my mom an apology. So after building up my courage (don't give me that look, it's harder to apologize when you actually mean it -.-), I decided I'd apologize to her.
And apologize I did. Hundreds of times. Ok kidding, three times. And the reaction? Ignored. Yes. My mom just ignored my apology. Whoosh.
So yeah, I was pretty much fucked up the whole day today, so I decided like yesterday that I'll go for a quiet walk. This time, though, I went with another friend who herself was in a pretty serious mess. So, just to get our minds off the problems of our lives, we went together.
I never dedicate my posts or give credit to someone else for them, but today is an exception I'll make for that friend who gave me some much needed company today. And who's the reason why I'm blogging at all right now. So AD, this post is just for you ;). I hope it makes you feel better.
Like always, we didn't go anywhere in particular, just walking on the roads and the market streets, discussing about everything - our schools, trips we'd been to, other weird stuff, etc. Anything but our problems. So yeah, it was a pretty good evening that I've had in quite some time. It helped me forget about my problems for once, at least. I hope it did for her too. Cuz I just want her to be fine.
I'm not gonna make this post much long though, so I guess I'll finish it here itself. And I didn't click any pictures, save for one picture of the sunset, and even that didn't come out as expected. So that's the one picture I'm gonna post. And I also thought of starting this new feature in my posts, "Song of the day", which just tells which song was on my mind the whole day, or the song which described the day perfectly, etc etc. 

So today's Song of the Day is "Angel" by Jack Johnson, which I dedicate to the weirdest friend I've ever had.

Angel - Jack Johnson

"She wears a smile that makes me wanna sing
she gives me presents with her presence alone"

When nothing goes right, take a walk.

Ok so you may have guessed from the title that I had a shitty day today. Yes I did. And it was pretty much fucked up like hell.
So I had this really stupid fight with my mom (which was my fault, obviously) and she isn't talking to me now.
Anyways, she went out for some work, and I was left alone with my brother. How exciting. I decided I needed some fresh air, so I grabbed my earphones, and went for a walk. I told my brother that I was going to recharge my balance and data plan, not that he gave a fuck anyways.

It was actually good that I went for a walk, cuz it helped me to get my mind off the incident for a bit.
Anyways so, I clicked some pictures while walking. So today I'm not writing much, just posting the pics, with a description for each. Hope you like them.

-Managed to capture the setting sun from between these buildings.

-Clicking a picture while crossing the road. Not advised, of course. 

-The best graffiti I've come across in quite some time. Very true too.

-Uh not sure why I'm posting this one, to be honest. Thought it'll increase the length of the post :P

Maybe the graffiti gang which made that art. Just thought I'd give them some credit.

-And finally, ending the day with an ice cream. Narcissist mode on.

Until next time, adios.